How to Count Championships

Click on the photo above and read closely at the top. This is from Alabama's own 1983 Football program.

January 9th is a big day for college football fans as the 2012 BCS National Championship is being contested.  This time of year usually comes with lots of talk, speculation, bets, and general conversation about our opinions and who we’re pulling for.  The other day I was with the Cripple Hawk and we were talking about this game.  The next day at work, a co-worker came up talking about how Alabama is going to win #14 and Auburn only has #2.  (Yet again, a reason that if LSU wins I won’t be upset.)  I corrected him on his counting method of national championships and showed him the evidence and then thought to myself, why not do the same here?  I’m not trying to break Bama down.  They have a great history and tradition.  I do however feel if you’re going to run around throwing out numbers and putting bumper stickers on your car, you at the very least, shouldn’t mind if someone explains how you got to 14 and why it’s a fallacy to leave Auburn at 2. 

Before we get to the easy stuff, a little groundwork.  There have been, since 1869, 39 “Major Selectors” that have played a part in naming who they thought the National Champion should be.  Some are math based organizations and some are poll based organizations.  Regardless, that’s a lot.  Starting in 1934, the AP poll began being recognized as the preeminent poll and the most respected for naming a National Champion.  One aspect that will come up later is that up until 1968, the AP poll was taken at the end of the regular season and prior to bowl games. 

Also, we have the Coaches’ Poll, to make it easy, but this poll has been called all sorts of stuff so we’ll just refer to it as the Coaches’ Poll.  It’s been the same poll, but run by different organizations so we’ll just use the AP and Coaches’ poll for terminology. 

These are two of the 4 Major Selectors that have been used to determine who the “Consensus National Champion” has been since 1950.  The 4 of these polls include the AP Poll, Coaches’ Poll, Football Writers Association of America, and the National Football Foundation/College Football Hall of Fame.  So, basically here’s what we have.

Prior to 1936, there were numerous polls and many of them were regional.  In 1934 and finally in 1936, the AP Poll came on the scene and took a national poll and was immediately considered “the” poll.  In 1950, the creation of the “two poll” system came about with the introduction of the Coaches’ Poll.  Now, this poll is contractually obligated to name it’s champion the same as the BCS, so the only opportunity now for a split champion out of these polls is for the AP to vote different from the BCS.  So to sum this section up.  Prior to 1936, there was no one-single poll that was considered “the” poll and in 1936, we got that Poll (AP).  You wanted to be the AP National Champion.  Then, 1950 comes along and you want to be the AP and the Coaches’ poll champion or you split it with someone else.  Then, finally as the years progress, there’s the AP, Coaches’, FWAA and the NFF championships that are all thrown into the “Consensus National Champion”.  You want all of these, and at least the majority, or else you again split it and are just claiming part of it.  So, here’s where the counting comes in. 

Alabama Claims these years as their championships that comprise at this time, 13:  1925, 1926, 1930, 1934, 1941, 1961, 1964, 1965, 1973, 1978, 1979, 1992, 2009.  Let’s look at these in-depth, again not to destroy anything, but to merely analyze the truth behind these championships that are claimed. 

1925- They had 8 out of 11 major selectors in this pre-AP era poll system.  It was split with Dartmouth and Michigan.  They had the majority

1926- They had 5 out of 13 major selectors in this pre-AP era poll system.  It was split with Lafayette, Navy, Michigan, and Stanford. 

1930- They had 3 out of 12 major selectors in this pre-AP era poll system.  It was split with only Notre Dame who had the rest.

1934- They had 4 out of 12 major selectors in this pre-AP era poll system.  It was split with Minnesota who had the rest. 

Now, Bama disappears until 1941 which is now in the AP poll era.  Up to this point, the team with the majority of the selectors was widely considered by the masses as the “National Champion”.

1941- Alabama has 1 out of 14 major selectors.  It’s split with Minnesota and Texas with Minnesota having 11 of the remaining 13 major selectors, including the AP.

Now, Bama disappears until 1961 which is now in the Dual poll era.  This era also contains the FWAA and the NFF polls naming their champions.  Again, all of these voting for you is best, or it’s a split with someone else, leaving you with the “Consensus National Champion” because any 1 of the major 4 voted for you.  The public however, still looked widely at the AP poll as the major poll to have here and they also paid attention to who had the most out of the 4.

1961- Alabama has the AP, UPI, and the NFF polls while Ohio State has the FWAA.  Split national championship but Alabama had an overwhelming popular opinion as the champion that year.

1964- A crazy year.  Alabama was voted the AP and UPI national champion at the end of the regular season.  Arkansas had the FWAA and Notre Dame had the NFF championship.  However,  Alabama lost in the Orange Bowl to Texas, leaving Arkansas as the only undefeated, untied team after the Razorbacks defeated Nebraska in the Cotton Bowl Classic.  The press was noted for saying that they wouldn’t make that mistake again, because they felt Arkansas should’ve been given the AP championship along with others.

1965- Alabama take the AP and the FWAA while Michigan State takes the UPI, FWAA, and the NFF.  That’s not a typo.  The FWAA voted both as national champion making it useless for a determining factor. 

1973- Alabama takes the UPI poll while Michigan, Notre Dame, Oklahoma and Ohio State split the rest.  However, Notre Dame has a convincing majority of the public and polls by taking the AP, FWAA and the NFF. 

1978- Alabama take the majority with the AP, FWAA and the NFF, but USC and Oklahoma split the rest with USC taking the UPI.

1979- Alabama flat-out took the cake with all 4 major selectors.

1992- Alabama again takes the cake with all 4.

2009- Alabama take the cake. 

Now, that is how the voting and polls determined the championships for those years that Alabama has claimed 13 championships.  Now, at this point, I took a few days off and engaged some conversations with people who were alive in the 50′s and so on to get their opinion about one thing.  What Major Selector did you consider to be the one that you would count as a National Championship selection, worth claiming.  This came from a mix of fans from schools including Alabama and the overwhelming answer was the AP and the UPI (Coaches’ Poll).  When asked about the organizations who awarded the others to Alabama, they had never heard of them really and sure didn’t remember them carrying any clout towards the National Championship record books.  One step further, most of them said the AP national champion was ”the” champion, and the UPI was seen as 2nd rate to the AP.  If you had both, you had the “consensus” champion but if you only got one, you wanted the AP.  So, out of the years 1925, 1926, 1930, 1934, 1941, 1961, 1964, 1965, 1973, 1978, 1979, 1992, 2009, as listed above, only 7 of these were AP national championships (1961, 1964, 1965, 1978, 1979, 1992 and 2009).  In 1973, Alabama won the UPI National Championship.  So, in conclusion here, out of the 13 National Championships claimed by Alabama, 7 of them were nationally recognized by the AP, 1 by the UPI alone, and the other 5 came from any major selector.  So, that’s the breakdown and it leads to a funny question in modern times.  How do people feel about split national championships today? 

As I listen to sports radio, co-workers, friends and family, there’s one opinion that so passionately expressed that it makes me laugh.  If Alabama beats LSU tonight, the AP is stupid for voting LSU or anyone else as National Champion, thus creating a Split National Champion.  My problem with this is, how can any fan but especially an Alabama fan (and I say that only because even Tony Barnhart believes they have one of the most questionable record of National Championships around) not believe in the split national championship?  Let’s look at it this way; how many of the 13 national championships aren’t split for Alabama (Considering that most reputable sources would say the AP and the UPI were needed for the consensus national championship from 1936 to the onset of the BCS.)  Well, let’s see.  It looks like in the pre-AP era, (1925, 1926,1930,1934), not one year did the selectors give the majority of votes to Alabama.  In two years, 4 and 5 teams “split” the selectors, and in the other two years, it was split between two school with the majority of votes going to the other school.  Now, in the post-AP era and before the UPI came about in 1950, Alabama was picked once, in 1941 as the champion but it wasn’t an AP.  Now, from 1950, forward let’s look at it because this would be the timeframe where we can now have a consensus national champion because we have the AP and the UPI.  In this era (and we’ll go ahead and throw in the BCS era), they had 5 Championships where it was considered a “consensus” championship.  So, now how does this look? 

Out of 13 claimed national championships, 5 would be considered as legitimate consensus, non-split national championships (and don’t forget in 1964 the AP was given out before the bowl games, and since they got beat, making AP voters change the next year due to the regret of not being able to give it to undefeated Arkansas, they started passing out their championship after the bowl game starting in 1965)…but we’ll stay with 5 cause that’s what the facts say.  What about the other 8.  Well basically, more than half of the championships they claim are a form of a split national championship with 4 of them being in the pre-AP system where they claimed as little as 1 major selectors’ opinion. 

So, how can any Alabama fan with a bumper sticker or T-shirt with “13 National Championships” on it, say that they’re against a split national championship. Over half of the ones they claim are splits and most half of those aren’t even split between the AP and UPI. 

Now again, I’m not trying to tear down Alabama, but I’m a person that works in numbers and facts.  Factually and quantitatively, there is a huge disparity between the way that some count their championships and the truth of reality.  Also, isn’t it only fair to count for other schools the same way you do for yours?  Let’s see what facts we uncover this way.

By using the same counting method as Alabama has used to claim 13 national championships, also somehow which escapes me, allowing some fans to say they have more than anyone, did you know that Yale has 26 National Champions and Princeton has 28?!  That’s incredible.  Whether it’s right or wrong, it is the same counting method.  Or let’s look at how they count their numbers, then compare it to their cross state rival.  The whole time their claiming 13 National Championships, with one counting method, they used a different to tell Auburn fans they had one.  If you actually used the same method of counting, the numbers aren’t right, and neither is the argument. 

Now, I’m fully aware of how and where my teams’ championships have come from and I’m also aware of how many more Alabama has than Auburn.  The facts folks.  I get it.  I also get how awesome of a tradition Alabama has and how it’s historically a great and very successful program.  I simply don’t understand why a program that has such a great history and so much to be proud of, if you didn’t fudge numbers, feels the need to do so.  Are you really proud of the 1930 year where Knute Rockne’s Fighting Irish had 3 times the voters saying they were the champions?  Or what about when Minnesota had twice as many voters saying they were the champions in 1934?  And 1941?  You hold your head high about the 1 out of 14 votes you got when Minnesota again had 11 out of the 14?  It seems even like a stretch on the 1964 claim where you had the voters publically issuing regret so deep, for voting for you, that they changed the whole freaking system.  Take it where you can get it right?  Why don’t we just go ahead and issue a BCS title right now before the game’s played because I don’t guess it matters who wins the bowl game right?  If it does however, let’s drop the 1964 title from our books so we aren’t hypocritical.  And why we’re talking about being hypocritical, if you don’t like split national championships, then drop those 8 that you’re claiming that are split.  Hey, you got 5 you don’t have to worry about and that’s incredible.  Just don’t fuss if about method of doing things, while that very method, got you 8 out of your 13 championships (and if you want to be really technical, let’s keep in mind you only have ALL voters voting for you and nobody else ONCE…yes once, in 2009).  Even in ’61, and 1992, other school received votes.  Oh, let’s look at that for one second before we close. 

By the method that Alabama claims 13 big ones, did you know that Auburn has 5?  Yeah, Auburn has 5 trophies of their own if you count the same way that Alabama gets to 13!  War Eagle right?  Wrong…we only claim the ones that we should claim thus we proudly take our 2.  But, let’s be fair.  Since y’all can claim a National Championship for just one selector, did you know that you share 1992 with Florida State? You also share every one of your other championships with other schools, if they count the way you do.  But, for some reason, and I don’t know what that would be…maybe some sense of dignity or something, Florida State doesn’t claim that 1992 championship in their books.  Auburn doesn’t claim 1913, 1983 or 1993 even though they got a minimum of 3 votes from selectors for those years.  Who else?  USC doesn’t claim 1979.  Oklahoma doesn’t claim 1978, and I’m pretty sure you get the point.  It seems that one school has a drastically different method of counting how many championships they have in comparison to the rest of the country in the history of college football. 

Again, I’m not trying to breakdown the greatness that Alabama has experienced because it’s one of the greatest football stories of all time.  But, facts are facts and sadly, the facts and figures paint a picture that takes away from the greatness of that program, simply in my opinion.  I would be embarrassed to claim a championship that I didn’t deserve or didn’t win by the same standards that the rest of the country uses.  It says something, to me at least, for a program to hold their head high for the accomplishments they have earned the hard way, even if it’s only 2 (when by using Alabama’s Method of Counting, it should be 5). 

So, if the Tide rolls their way over some Tigers tonight, will it be 8, 6, 2, 14, or what?  I guess it just depends on if you want to be proud of what you’ve legitimately earned or if you just want to grab at anything.  Personally I’d rather have $2 I earned than $14, if it meant that $8 or so aren’t really mine. 

and before people start saying anything to Auburn fans about if we want y’all to win or not; remember these?  Cripple Hawk?

 

 

Attitude. What is it?

   Attitude.  What does that word mean to you?  Think about it?  Is it something that you would think about being purely mental or emotional, or is it something else?  Interestingly enough, it’s hard to find a definition of it that doesn’t pertain to the physical as well.  Psychologically speaking, it’s defined as 

a hypothetical construct that represents an individual’s degree of like or dislike for something. Attitudes are generally positive or negative views of a person, place, thing, or event— this is often referred to as the attitude object.

   This definition, being strictly from a psychological aspect and not a physical one, I think does a pretty good job putting in perspective for discussion’s sake.  Either positive or negative, differing degrees of like or dislike, and here’s what I like; there’s an object at the center of it.  I don’t think we need to discuss what positive and negative is, or what differing degrees mean, but I think it’s vastly important to discuss this idea of the object being present.

   Don’t we all go around and say, “He just has a bad attitude.” or “I can’t stand being around them for too long cause their attitude sucks.”  It’s funny how most of us would, in casual conversation and not thinking about it, would consider that attitude is this very broad spectrum thing that just is there and encompasses everything.  Like it’s a part of our personalities or something.  Like it’s something that we can’t help.  I don’t believe that for a second. 

   If we look at it as something focused on an object, wouldn’t that be a great thing?  Wouldn’t it be awesome, when we’re moping around, being a jerk, or even in a good mood for some reason, to be able to identify what the object is to it?  I don’t know about you, but I would rather be able to identify the source of my moping and jerk-ness, and fix it.  I would also, love to identify why I’m in a good mood so I can replicate that more often.  I think this also allows for more compassion from people around us doesn’t it?  Shouldn’t it? 

   Think about those people, whom we all know, who just walk around with a horrible attitude.  Let’s redefine it…they’re walking around with a horrible view of some object and here’s where the physical aspect comes in; it shows.  They are always negative, rude, angry, etc.  They put down the good things that others around them have.  They look as if they’re hurting sometimes.  Generally speaking, it’s not that the attitude is who they are, rather it’s a perspective that is focused on an object or objects, that they view as (to differing degrees) negative, and it is showing in their physical life.  I believe this opens a door for compassion and a helping hand, rather than falling into the trap of…wait for it…our newly created bad attitude with them as our object.

   I think our natural human instinct, as it is in so many cases is to be reactive and not proactive.  All too often, we find ourselves reacting to things as opposed to being proactive and choosing our response.  Doesn’t this line of thought about what an attitude is, and it being focused on an object and not just a way of being, give us a good tool to use, helping us not be reactive by creating our own attitude but instead, be proactive and choose a helpful positive response?  I find this at work often when I pray.  The act of praying forces me into a more spiritual, Christian way of thinking and I often find the errors of my thinking in prayer.  My natural, worldly thoughts are often exposed to be in conflict with what my spirit knows to be right and it often is focused around this attitude mindset.  Whether it’s towards a person, something that happened at work, some life event or whatever, I find that my natural and spiritual instincts don’t always line up and it’s often because I haven’t chosen the proper attitude to take to it. 

   What do most people do when they see tears streaming down someone’s cheeks?  Most would wonder what’s wrong, wondering if they can help, wanting to make that person feel better, etc.  They show compassion.  But what is a tear other than an indicator, an object, that shows us something is wrong?  Saline and oil?  Tears are a visible object that eliminates our need to “read into the situation”.  Sometimes they’re joyful tears and those would tell us that something has gone good, right?  Well, here’s an idea I have and I’ll issue a challenge with it; let’s look at attitudes around us not as an inconvenience (I agree that they can be) but as indicators much like we do tears.

  Picture It:  Sicily, 1934.  Just kidding and $1 for the first one to name that reference.  Anyway, I challenge you to do this for just one week and then tell me about your experiences with it.  Tell me what changes you see in your own attitude and in the attitudes of those around you, when you proactively respond to their attitudes the way you would if they were tears.  Bad attitude?  Think to yourself, I hate their attitude, but it’s telling me something isn’t right with them.  I wonder if I can do something. Good attitude?  Be happy for that person because things may be going really well.  Let’s all consider people’s attitudes as merely an indicator to their condition and then respond accordingly.  I like this idea much better than allowing someone else’s bad attitude to form one in me that I have to deal with inside my own spirit, and I bet you that a good attitude can be contagious! 

I don’t like that man.  I must get to know him better. 

~Abraham Lincoln

   Maybe our friend Honest Abe was on to something.  First it seems he’s aware that there is something he doesn’t know.  Second, he’s proactively choosing a different reaction that was most of our instincts would tell us to do.  I think that we could all have enriched lives by realizing how much in our lives could be choices and not reactions.  Of course you’d feel like a victim and be down if you feel you have no control and your life just sucks, but by choosing a different choice, how much of that could be made better?  What if you could help others think that way too.  What if you could be a valuable instrument to help others identify the object of their down attitudes, thus enabling them to help themselves? 

Let’s not be victims to others negative views of an object in their lives but instead be a light and a source of positive reinforcement to them, and maybe, just maybe our positive attitude will be contagious! 

 

Letter to Me…at 18

Reagan,

I know you won’t believe this, but I am you 14 years from now.  I know that doesn’t make sense but a lot of stuff in your life doesn’t make sense so deal with it.  I’m writing you to talk to you about some things that will help you in the future.  Now, I obviously know you and I know that you won’t really listen to anything I say, because you’re hot-headed and think you know everything there is to know, but you don’t.  So, trust me (you) and shut up and listen a little.

For starters, let’s talk a little about that attitude of yours.  It sucks.  You’re not a victim, so quit acting like one.  So you moved to a town where it’s really hard to adjust.  Suck it up and get over it.  You’ll only be there a few years before you’re back out but some of those people you’ll meet will mean the world to you and others; forgotten names.  Cherish the time you have with your close friends, the yard rolling (except for getting shot at), the church groups you run around with, and just the time that’s available to you.  Life will pick up soon so enjoy that time you have there.

Now, you got really lucky with that whole dropping out of high school stunt.  Right now you’re embarrassed everyday because you actually went back to finish and you should be.  You weren’t smarter or have it figured out any better, you just got lucky with that stunt.  It actually was probably what needed to happen.  Thank God for blessing that idiotic move.  I know it’s really hard to hold your chin high every day when you’re getting talked about but just persevere.  You’ll learn, if you haven’t already, that you can actually sing a little and someone’s gonna pay you to go to college to do that.  I know, but it’s true.  Thank God again Reagan.  So, hang on to your good friends again and you’ll get through LHS just fine and you will actually make a few folks proud of you for finishing.  It’ll be a good feeling in the end.  On to Southern Union.

This place is going to change your life!  Seriously, this is going to be 2 of the most fun and challenging times of your life.  You’re going to actually be a pretty good student.  Something about that extra year of high school will end up lighting a fire under your butt so make the best of it.  Do NOT take biology at 6:45 am!  It seems like a good idea but is horrible.  Trust me.  Really Reagan, embrace this time.  Don’t get your feelings hurt when friends you go there with sort of split off and don’t spend a lot of time with you.  They’ll be growing as individuals,just like you will be, and it’s a good thing.  You’re going to meet some amazing people here.  You’re going to meet a few dirt bags too but they’ll pass.  These are awesome folks primarily so make the most of it.  You pretty much will without me telling you to but if there’s anything left to squeeze out of that, do.  Now, you’ll downplay the first scholarship because you just will, but don’t be afraid to go after others.  Just apply to Montevallo.  That’s it.  You’ll get scholarships all over the state but, just go to Montevallo.  If you thought you had a good time at SUSCC, you won’t believe what happens at Montevallo.  Be patient.  I know that’s tough for you but be patient.  Montevallo will end up giving you the scholarship you want so don’t be a hothead again and buy that dumb trailer in Auburn, only to leave before the fall semester starts.  You’re going to put people in a bad position trying to help you so just don’t waste your time.  Oh, Montevallo…

I don’t really know anything to tell you here honestly.  You do pretty good here on your own.  Your time in College Night is incredible, you love your time in PiKA.  You make a lot of friends, make good grades, and have the time of your life.  If anything, just take this time to realize that again, you still don’t know everything and for God’s sake, don’t try to hurry through life.  Just take your time with it.  Rough times are ahead Reagan and they’ll stick around for a while!  Take your time, make the best out of Montevallo, and just love life.  You’re going to laugh a lot, make a lot of memories with a lot of people, and this place will end up changing you.  Some for the better and some for the worse.  Be aware Reagan.  Be present in your life through here.  You won’t learn this concept of being present til later in your 20′s, so please listen now.  Be present, be aware, and don’t just be reactive to your life.  Every decision you make here will affect you and if you’re not proactively being the person you want to be, you’ll be made into someone you don’t want to be whether you like it or not.

Let’s skip to the rough patch because you’re going to do what you want to do anyway.  Beware of December 2006.  It’s a doozie.  You’ll experience something that, even as I write this at 32, none of your friends have dealt with.  You’ll get through it and move on, but be careful about how you do it.  To compensate, you’ll drink way too much and party way too much Reagan.  Now don’t get me wrong; you’ll make some great memories and I still have close friendships that were forged during this time.  However, you’ll make bad decisions with your career and money and you’ll pay for that…for a long few years.

During this time Reagan, take the time to find out who you are, and who you want to be.  Don’t try to be who others want you to be.  You’ll feel the need for acceptance and friendship more than ever right now and I, even now, understand the tendency to feel that you should do some things you’re not proud of but don’t.  Be someone you can be proud of when you go to sleep at night.  Don’t think about just that moment or experience but think about the man you’re becoming.  You’ll look back at a point in your life in 2008 and be ashamed of yourself.  Still, the silver lining here is that you’ll make friendships that you still have and are very important to you so, have fun at the Ocho, play soccer with them when they ask you to, and be prepared to let some people down; worst of all yourself.

You’re going to wish you could have never lived the year of 2007.  It will be horrible.  You’ll be embarrassed and will probably not be real honest with a lot of people about what’s going on.  Even now, I can sympathize with that sentiment.  You’ll be someone who everybody knows your business and out of sheer shame and embarrassment, you’ll lie to try to save face.  There’s probably a better way to handle that but, I still can’t say I blame ya’.  Most the people you’ll know won’t understand.  And don’t worry about Jason, he’ll be upset for a little while but you guys will be just fine and better.  Maybe one day people will realize that you were just trying to hold your chin up high when you didn’t know how, but if they don’t, just pray they never will have to.

You’ll go from the top of the mountain to the deepest trough in the ocean this year.  Take ownership of some of it Reagan and slow that snowball down a little.  Some of this situation will just be life kicking you in the mouth and you can’t do anything about it, but the reactions and your response to these situations will be critical.  They’ll end up being more crucial, and in my experience, damaging, to your future than the original hand that Life dealt you.  Don’t flip out.  Take things in stride as best as you can.  It won’t be easy and when it starts, it’ll be like a Tsunami so, head for the high ground.  Make the right decisions.  You’ll end up feeling more loneliness, more embarrassment, more shame, and more pain than you ever have and ever thought you could, but again, give thanks to God because He’s gonna blow your mind in 2008!!!

You’ll get through 2007 finally, have fun at the beginning of 2008 and in April God will really blow your mind and teach you more about Himself and you than you can imagine!  You’re still gonna be down on yourself, sleeping in your truck periodically (it’s your own fault), and sleeping on couches a lot, always about 4 or 5 days from getting that truck repossessed, and hungry a lot.  But, late March and early April, God will reveal himself to you in a very unexpected way and it will change you forever.

Meg Upton.  Even writing this now it still amazes me but, Meg Upton will be your angel.  You will tell her on numerous occasions to not get mixed up with you but she won’t listen.  You’ll be literally days from leaving for the Navy, but you’ll stay because of her.  You’ll be looking for God to answer your tearful prayers totally different from He chooses to.  You’ll need money, you’ll need someone to believe in you, you’ll need a genuine love around you, you’ll need hugs, you’ll need someone to tell you it’ll be okay, you’ll need someone to just make you laugh, and you’ll need someone to just smile when they see you.  Meg will help with all of them and just because that’s who she is.  You’ll not have to hide from her, run from her, lie to her, or be someone else.  She will love you, truthfully and faithfully, faults and all…situations and all.  God will put demonstrate Himself to you through her and she won’t even know it.  Y’all will have a lot of fun and 2008′s gonna be a great year for you after all.  You’re gonna get a good job and you’re gonna get engaged to that awesome little lady.  God will begin his redemption of you in 2008.  You won’t believe that He will for a long time and sometimes you won’t think you’re gonna make it, but when she changes your life by just being herself, watch out.  We got another fire lit to get some stuff straightened out.

2009 is just a continuation of 2008 and a little better.  You and Meg together will continue your improvement of the situations that exist.  You’ll get rid of those debts, you’ll enjoy your job, Meg will graduate, y’all will get your first apartment, then BOOM!  October 3rd, 2009 you’ll marry your Angel.  Wow how God will bless you when you think He’s not even there just a couple of years earlier.  Now, don’t get arrogant here because it’s because of people around you and God that you’ll be able to make these changes.  All you need to do is take advantage of opportunities when they arise.

The next couple of years up until where I am writing this right now will have tribulations and trials, caused by just life and stuff out of your control and some by your own idiotic and ridiculous bad decision-making skills.  You’ll get laid off, forsaken by friends, you’ll face defeat, and will hurt people.  Life won’t be perfect and again, some of it’s your fault and some of it isn’t.  All you can do is be the person that you feel you need to be.  However, you’ll continue to see God more and more everyday.  He’ll continue to bless your marriage to Meg in ways that will make your jaw drop.  You’ll realize that no matter what you face, the two of you will get through it just fine, and actually come out stronger and more in love on the backside.  You’ll be told once, “the higher the temperature, the stronger the steel.”  That will be you two.  You’ll get through everything you face whether it’s your fault or not and be better on the backside.  Now, I’m writing this just after our 2 year anniversary and it’s been a heck of a two years with all signs pointing up and up.

Basically Reagan, don’t be angry.  You have no real reason to be angry at life or any person.

Don’t let circumstances or people mold you into someone you don’t want to be, no matter how good of friends you may think you are, or that you’re ashamed of.  Judge yourself by God’s opinion and not that of the people around you.  Sometimes you’ll find yourself in situations where the people around you have one agenda and it disagrees with your spirit.  Don’t be afraid to go against the grain in those situations and be who you are.  Don’t be confrontational in general, but don’t let people make you someone you’re not because you may look backwards one day and be ashamed of your actions.  You be you and be a person of principle and morals.  (I’ll work on this one for the rest of my life.)

Relax a little bit and “be present’ in your life.  If you’re eating lunch with someone, then make the best of that lunch time with that person.  If you’re reading a book, don’t think about other stuff but take time to really read it.  If you’re on the patio playing cornhole (it’s not around yet but you’ll love it), just enjoy the people you’re with.  Always make the most of what you’re doing right then.  If you’re at work…work hard.  If you’re at play…play hard.

Be gentle.  You’re a real asshole when you want to be and that still hasn’t stopped so I can’t help you there but maybe if I had tried to stop when I was 18 I might be better off.  Just be more gentle.  You’ll get farther with people.  No matter how much you think they do, hardly anybody you know will really give a crap about your opinion or thoughts.  So, be more gentle and it will people relate to you better.  You’ll also have less apologizing to do probably and hurt less people in the long run.

Be loyal.  You’ll experience a lot of people turning their back on you and forsaking you.  It will hurt every time no matter the circumstances.  A couple will talk to you before hand but most will not.  You won’t be perfect at this yourself but try.  As I write this, this is a trait found less and less in people in this society so “be what you want to see in the world.”  There’s something to be said Reagan for a person that is always there in tough times for their friends.  You won’t do everything right and you’ll hurt people, even those you love.  But, even a dog bites it’s owner than will lay his life down to defend him.

Laugh a lot.  At 32, you’ll find it harder to laugh than you do now.  I don’t know if it has to be that way but always enjoy laughing and making others laugh.  Trying to joke around and make others laugh isn’t immature or stupid.  It’s tonic for the soul and it will help you, and others a lot between 18 and 32.  It’s a gift you have so don’t let life get you down or keep you fromusing this gift because you won’t be the only one hurt.  God blessed you with this ability so don’t take it for granted.

Don’t be selfish.  I may have just not been aware of it when I was your age, but geez this world has gotten so self-centered.  Realize you have gifts, abilities, and that to a very small group of people, just you being their friend is a gift to them.  Just don’t be a selfish jerk who always thinks of himself first.  You do, rather you believe it or not, have a lot to offer and friendship is a gift in itself.  Love your Meg unselfishly.  She does that for you without trying so return that favor you a-hole.  You’ll find that sometime around your late 20′s, you’ll lose some pride and get down on yourself and will question what you have to offer anyone.  Remember, you can always offer love, a hug, a smile, help, and a friendship.

Believe in people.  This one is short and sweet.  Everybody has struggles and makes mistakes.  Now, most won’t admit they do but they do.  Some will be like you and need nothing more than someone who believes in them and demonstrates it.  Get to really know people, and once you know them, don’t let circumstance or rumors or anything tell you different.  Even good people do bad things and just as Meg will believe in you when not many others do and invest in you, you can do that for others.  Don’t give up on people you care about just as God doesn’t give up on you!

You do NOT know everything.  You’re going to have people, like your parents try to advise you and help you and so don’t be stupid and just listen to them.  You are 18 years old and they’re much wiser and smarter than you are.  You have been sheltered and don’t know anything really.  You have no concept of money, bills, insurance, etc.  It makes you look more stupid to not accept advice then it does when you try to do it all on your own to “prove you know what you’re talking about”.  This spreads into situations too.  Don’t just go off of what you hear about situations, people, and life in general.  You hear something about a friend of yours?  Talk to them about it before you act hastily.  Don’t jump into a situation without knowing what you’re getting into, regardless of what others say.  There are at least 2 sides to any story and numerous perspectives, and you should be responsible enough of an ‘adult’ to know both before you act.  Don’t let people mislead you without knowing the whole story.  Lastly, realize that your opinion or feeling is based on your experience.  People around you may make mistakes or what you think is a bad decision but you don’t know where they’re at or what their experiences are that may have lead them down that path.  Information is powerful and necessary so realize that often times, you don’t have enough of it and it’s responsible to get as much as you can before you act.

and lastly…

Learn to forgive yourself a little Reagan.  You are gonna hurt people (more than you should), you’re gonna lie (sometimes to just try to maintain a sense of dignity through hard times and sometimes cause you just do), and numerous other things that God will teach you aren’t what He would have you do in the form of conviction.  Listen to that conviction because it brings growth and clarity about your life, and always with a little more of a glimpse of who God is.  However, realize that you have to forgive yourself because God did.  God will forgive you and show you more grace and mercy in the next 14 years than He should.  But, He doesn’t do that for you to beat up on yourself about years of mistakes and hard times.  He wants you to realize the errors of your ways and start making better decisions so you can have a bright and abundant future.  Somewhere around 31 and 32, you’ll start to realize it.  You’ll start to realize that your role in this world, at the simplest, may be nothing more than to love those around you, unselfishly, loyally, and with no worry about gain to yourself.  You’ll learn that God has loved you through being wretched and forgiven you for that, and that maybe your only job is to do that to those around you.  In order though, you have to forgive yourself a little.  You’ll make quite a few “small” boo-boo’s and a few monumental errors that will make you ashamed that you were capable of such a thing, but God will  not only love you, He will keep you and bless you, not as a reward to wrong doing, but to help get you back on the “narrow path”.

This letter won’t fix everything and it shouldn’t.  You’ll make mistakes and learn hopefully but if you’ll just take it and ponder, it should help avoid a few pitfalls that didn’t have to happen. I still don’t have all this fixed myself but I at least see it now where I didn’t see it then.  Enjoy your early 30′s because they’re pretty good thus far and remember this…you are the only one that can make you someone you can be proud of…

14 years from now…

A Modern Dilemna

   Last night I was hanging around the house with my awesome wife.  We had just finished dinner and a good friend come by to visit for a bit.  Then I watched the Season Finale of Sons of Anarchy and was just hanging out after that.  Nothing out of the ordinary or extraordinary.  Just a nice evening around our apartment with good company.  However, my mind was racing about different stuff.  That usually puts me somewhat in the mood to tweet something or write something on Facebook, but this was a little different. 

   I realized as I pulled Twitter up on my phone and opened up my blank spot to write in that I couldn’t think of anything.  I just sat there for a few minutes trying to think of something to say and couldn’t really find anything to say at all, but that lead me today to a few thoughts about things.

   One of the first things that crossed my mind was, “Does anybody really care what you write on Twitter or Facebook?”  I mean, how many times have I written on either one with not one like or response?  How many times do I look at others posts and do the exact same thing?  It would seem if I were to look at it, I’m not one of those folks that people feel the desire to really comment on their stuff.  Rather it’s because what I write is stupid or whatever, I don’t really care…but in reality does anybody else really?  I’m not the most clever, or witty, or important or “cool” person around so, those don’t help.  I can name a few people who actually respond or comment on stuff.  I’ve gone as far as to state that I’m trying to start a discussion and I get nothing, lol.  I remember when Facebook first came out.  It was what you did to try to connect with people and it was the new-ness of it I remember that made us utilize the network.  Same with Twitter.  Now it seems like having conversations, discussions, and really connecting with people is not the main function.  It seems that now the main function has shifted to providing a lazy way for people to keep up with each other or “stalk” their friends as opposed to having to call, text, email and heavens forbid visit with each other.  That transitions nicely to the next thought…

   Don’t we remember what it was like to actually talk to each other.  I mean really talk.  Have those talks that improve your relationships.  Have those talks that make you appreciate the individual more?  Have those talks that you remember years later?  I do.  I remember having talks with people before Facebook and twitter came around and it’s a drastic difference.  I’ve wondered in a lot of relationships what I’ve done different or wrong to make things in my own life change so much.  I’ve seen some relationships grow quickly, other decline, and some stay stagnant.  I can’t put almost all of them into 3 categories:

1.  Improved relationships – People I actually spend time with.  Actually have phone or in person conversations, and at the least, continuous email conversations.  The people that pertain to this category are people I’ve been around for years and only after I started spending time with them again, did I really appreciate them, saw their quirks, and were able to really appreciate them for who they are.  For these people, I realize that I do not rely on Facebook to keep me posted on what’s going on with them.  I don’t need to.  I have real conversations and at the least emails with them all the time and see them frequently.  These are great, healthy relationships in my life.  These relationships are the most comfortable to me because people can see more of “me” and vice versa.  There’s a comfort in knowing that I can be myself and that people are seeing it first hand and not trying to interpret what they see online or hear from someone else. 

2.  Stagnant relationships – I use the word stagnant just to demonstrate a non-moving relationship.  No negative connotation.  These relationships are pretty easy to explain.  No progress or digression necessarily.  It’s just not moving.  I feel that these relationships are that way because I may rarely see someone or see them just enough to reassure us both that we are in fact still friends.  We sadly however, know enough about what’s going on with each other without having spoken in a month or so.  We rely on Facebook and twitter to “stalk” the other one and are too lazy to take the time to visit or call or even email or text.  I get it that everybody has those relationships that don’t need maintenance to be incredible.  My neighborhood gang from childhood is that way.  I’m not talking about those sorts.  I’m just saying these are people who I don’t really talk to and rarely see, but it carries some weight to it and maybe it shouldn’t.  I guess I question these because if we are too lazy to spend time together, share a meal, a text, email or anything, what does that say? 

3.  Declining relationships – These are relationships that I can pinpoint very clearly that I feel have been damaged or totally cut off at the roots and kept from growing due to Facebook or twitter, or the culture that they’ve created in our society.  These are largely with people who rely so heavily on them, and put so much stock in them, that as happened Saturday, they’ll get mad at you and quit talking to you, because you post something about football they didn’t like.  Also, they’ll think they know everything about you because they read something on one of these sites.  Typically, in my experience, these people have a serious co-dependency on the internet and probably also love reading tabloids for their unbiased, highly researched and educational analysis of Kim Kardashian’s latest rumors and horrible TV shows.

   Regardless, I can look back at being in Montevallo when Facebook existed but wasn’t the number one tool of stalkers, and when Twitter wasn’t even around, and truly miss the conversations I used to have with folks…the closeness that came from trying to figure out the worlds problems…the acceptance that came from my porch with a hobo fire when some catholics, some protestants, and some people who couldn’t care less would discuss anything and everything and love each other all the same, while mostly disagreeing.  Now, we get defriended and use it as a method to exact our anger on someone for saying they don’t think Alabama should play for the national championship. 

   In reality, I just think, as I’ve stated in past blogs, that a culture’s been created that is becoming harmful to relationships of all kinds.  I called someone the other day to just say Hi and it was like I was begging for money for the 10oth time.  They didn’t know what to do.  It’s someone I’ve known for years and used to never be at a loss for words with and it was like I just met them.  It was so hard to talk to them.  I’ve seen people tell me I had a certain mindset about something that we’ve never spoken about because of a comment I made a year prior on Facebook.  Really?  You know what’s in my mind and my character based on a backhanded comment on Facebook?  We have missed get togethers because we didn’t see a Facebook invite.

   I don’t think that Facebook and Twitter are all that bad if used responsibly.  Am I the only one though that recognizes the potential poison these things add to our lives?  Someone makes a random comment as a status update or a tweet and I’ve had people call me to know if I knew what someone else was talking about.  I said, “Why don’t you call them and ask them?”  We are more comfortable being hidden behind comments and statuses now rather than in front of friends.  Want to share some pics?  Awesome?  Want to share a great article you read?  Go for it?  Want to wish someone a happy birthday?  You can’t call them or text them personally?  Maybe they wanna hear your voice.  Have a problem with someone?  Sure, make a snide remark and share your business over the internet for everybody to read, why not?  Want me to never think your boyfriend is a good guy because EVERY SINGLE FIGHT YOU GET IN, YOU PUT IT ON FACEBOOK!?  Ok. 

Another thing.  I caught myself last night wanting to feel connected to some friends somehow.  Just a conversation.  Say Hi.  Something you know?  And what do I find myself doing?  Holding my stupid phone in my hand with a blank Tweet looking ridiculous just trying to find something deserving of a response to post.  I thought about calling someone just to talk, which I haven’t done in forever, and couldn’t think of anyone that would be happy to hear from me.  Am I really using Twitter and Facebook for companionship?  How sad is that?  Now, don’t read into something here.  Meg’s a napper so I am talking about primarily when we’re not together or she’s indisposed because we can’t shut up when we’re together!  Love that about us…I digress!  So, why not get off of them?  I think honestly, I’m afraid of not mattering. 

   I feel like Facebook and Twitter have become this way to gauge our importance at the very least, subconsciously.  Think about it.  If you had a twitter and never had a mention, a reply or anything, would you keep using it?  If every status update, chat message, regular message or photo went with no response or comment, would you keep using Facebook?  I think that I already don’t feel like anything I have to say or think really matters anymore, except to Meg, so what would happen if I got off Facebook and Twitter all together?  Would I ever get emailed?  Called?  Asked to visit?  Have a lunch together?  I don’t know.  What I do know is pretty simple though. 

   I know I miss good conversation.  I miss people coming to just hang out for no reason other than the enjoyment of just having company.  I miss laughing with people in those times when the need for company couldn’t be filled by Facebook or Twitter.  I miss those conversations that you remember for years or the random, “Hey, let’s do lunch next week and catch up.”  I miss those random “Hey, I’m bored, let’s go do something trips” where good memories and just “time together” was spent.  I just miss real quality interaction with people who leaves you feeling good about the relationship with that person.  I’m tired of seeing my friends lives pass me by in status updates and tweets with an occasional picture here and there. 

   I as a person have become too lazy I think.  I’m lazy with my relationships.  I could do better.  I need to remember that this is the only life I have and it’s not that long.  Why not make the most of it?  On my deathbed, I doubt I will be longing for more time on the couch playing on Facebook or twitter.  I doubt I will yearn for more time “like” your status or post a picture.  I’m sure I won’t be tweeting my final thoughts and wishing for more than 140 characters.  I will long for more time with Meg, our children (someday), my friends and loved ones.  I will be longing for more conversations, laughs, cries, and time to make memories.  I will regret not doing more to nurture the relationships with people God has blessed me with in my life.  I will want more time at the lake with friends.  I will want more time to hold Meg and laugh with her.  I’ll more want more time to talk in chinese accents and make a “foor of ourserves and raugh raugh raugh”!  I’ll want more time to discuss religion, politics and sports with friends…and I won’t want to do ANY of that over Facebook, twitter or any other social network.  I will want to do that in person or at least over a phone call.  I will want to experience as much as I can and I don’t want to get a comment on my wall saying, “I’m gonna miss you!”  or “RIP Reagan.  We had fun.”  

   “A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”

   I believe that to be so true.  Think about that.  For some reason, in its simplicity that strikes me as profound.  I remember one time looking at Facebook and seeing that I had 1400 friends and thinking, “You’re a real idiot Reagan.  For starters, you do not have 1400 friends.  You may have met that many people but they aren’t friends.  Secondly, you are nowhere near that important to much of anybody.”  After pondering it and a few cuts later, I’ve got it down to maybe 300 or so and that’s pushing it.  The point is, I don’t know how many people now could meet that definition above.  Sure, I’ve pushed people away.  Sure, I have done things that made people go away I’m sure.  I’m not perfect and I’m not one size fits all.  Some will like me and some won’t.  I can’t help that, but how precious in my life a person that fits that definition is now.  I would argue that with more quality time invested in my relationships and less Facebook ”stalking” time just to keep up, I could possibly have more of these people around me.  I have realized that I have very few people who I can be myself around.  Truly myself.  I’m passionate about things I care about, even more passionate and protective about people I care about, love a good discussion and I’ll even argue just cause I like those too, have a dirty mouth, am not offended by much of anything, so I probably offend people regularly,  probably too honest for my own good, care too much about principle, make bad decisions sometimes (a hell of a lot less than I used to), am too harsh at times, vulgar at times, a pretty awful and regular sinner (I’m ashamed of some of the things I’ve proven to be capable of), I think I’m right frequently, and have been infamous for leaving the sugar off the coating.  Hopefully there’s some good in there too.  Now,couple whatever good there may be with this 10% of the bad things about me I can think of right now, and if you can pick all that up through Facebook and Twitter to get the accurate picture of me, then you deserve a cookie! 

   We’ve been criticized for staying busy the way we do.  Sure, we like to do “stuff” but a larger reason is this.  We aren’t movie stars, or rock stars, or anybody else that is all that important.  I’m just Reagan.  Things aren’t like they used to be back in Motown when people were at my house all the time.  When someone thinks enough of us to invite us somewhere, even just for coffee, or wants to come over, or anything else, it’s special to Meg and I.  It’s not Facebook.  It’s not Twitter.  It’s real-time to share a good meal with friends.  A cup of coffee.  A few jokes and laughs.  Maybe even something serious.  Regardless, it’s special to us.  We don’t think so highly of ourselves that we just say No without trying.  We know people who will tell us for a week we’re gonna hang out, then the day of change their mind.  That hurts.  Do you think we don’t have lives and have scheduled time for you in it.  I’m tired too!  Are we not important to you or are you just that much more important of a person that you can just set my schedule?  Regardless, shouldn’t we put the same effort we expect out of others into our lives?  Who are we to be fussy about people doing the same crap we are?  Or, are we just becoming too lazy with our relationships that any real effort just doesn’t seem worth it because we can hide behind our social networks?  I don’t know.  I do know that I can do better on my end to be a real, human, interactive, caring, and loving person, in any role I have in my life. 

“Love is when two people know everything about each other and are still friends.”

“A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked”

“Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”

I just don’t know how I can expect the friends that are mentioned about to be created or maintained when I use the excuse of social networking as my #1 tool to contribute to these relationships.  I guess we’ll see. 

Oh, and do us both a favor.  If I am one of those people who you won’t find important enough to respond to if a message is written to you, just de-friend me.  Saves me wondering and writing you again!  Oh…

Love you all and Have a Merry Christmas.

It’s a Doozie…Fair Warning!

Well, it’s been a long while since I’ve written because I promised to not write unless something was really on my mind and the day has arrived.  It’s a unique position too, because I’m not 100% sure what I think at this moment, pretty sure but not 100%.  This blog may serve as a way for me to work that out, ya know?

This one is gonna be about an emotionally charged, political and social topic that is very real right now where I live in Alabama; the new Immigration Law.  Is it awful or just the “hard choice” to make?  Is it racist or does it just hit one group more than others?  Are we bad for being happy or bad for being against it?  These are a few of the questions I hope to gain some ground on.  For starters, let me go ahead and lay some groundwork to this discussion.  I didn’t write the stupid bill, I didn’t sign it into law, and I’m not picketing on the streets for it.  This is simply a blog of thoughts and stuff that is on my mind, so in the same vein that I’m not here to demonize any one person or group, I am here to shed some light on ILLEGAL immigrants…not legal ones.

I’ve admittedly grown to be short-tempered about one  thing in my life that just drives me nuts.  Our society has got this one-sided acceptance of opinion thing going on and I don’t like it.  You want me to accept your point of view and not demonize you or judge you personally, or embarass you, or talk to you like a dog because of how you feel?  That goes both ways, so, with that said, I’m just typing and you can hit the little “X” or hit “Apple-Q” at any point you wish.  With that said, let’s go.

I do belive that there’s an issue currently that needs to be dealt with.  Let’s look at just unemployment and the immigration problem alone, for starters.  I don’t even think that this needs a lot of explaining really either.  There are tons of people who need jobs in our state.  The obvious problem with the immigration status as it is right now is simple…these jobs need to be given to people who pay taxes and are here legally.  Plain and simple.  If part of your business plan as an owner is to hire people who aren’t legally allowed to work in the U.S., pay them peanuts, under the table, and not report taxes or pay any, then you are a P.O.S. in my opinion and have no business; running a business.  If you can’t afford to run a business because you’re following the rules, then you again, need to close up shop.  I mean really, you’re a dirtbag.  You should leave our state too, so other good businessmen who do things the right way can have your market share and give good jobs to people who deserve to be working…asian, black, white, hispanic, I don’t care as long as they’re following the rules to be here and accepting responsibility that comes with being allowed to work here.  Now on to the lack of taxes generated…

Don’t we all hate to look at pay stubs when we get paid to see those taxes coming out?  Or at least wishing that we had that money in our pocket for other stuff?  I know I do.  Now, think of how much of the money that people who are paying taxes pay, over the course of their lives to their state, feds, and cities for upkeep, services, and protection, fire departments, etc.  That’s a ridiculous amount of money.

Now, let’s think about how many people live here, take advantage of the same upkeep, services and protection, and don’t pay crap…on purpose!  I mean really.  I would love to be able to keep my money in my pocket and spend it on what I want to, when I want to, and get the same benefits as everybody who actually follows the letter of the law, but you know what?  I can’t.  I don’t want to.  I want to do my part.  I didn’t feel that bad about having to take unemployment for a little while at the beginning of this year, because I’ve PAID TAXES SINCE THE BEGINNING OF MY WORKING CAREER WHEN I WAS YOUNGer!  Not only do they enjoy the same services and benefits that those of us who pay do, but it goes a step further and places a burden on our infrastructure.

If a truck has a payload of 3200 lbs. and that’s what it’s meant to carry and no more, then what do you think it gonna happen when it has to bear the burden of another 1500 lbs.  If it doesn’t break all together, it will put such a strain on the structure that it will cease to work efficiently or effectively.  And, what would be the only way to get it working correctly again?  Either rebuild it for more payload (meaning you would have to raise taxes ON THE ONES THAT WILL ACTUALLY PAY THEM TO JUST CONTINUE TO BEAR THE BURDEN OF THOSE WHO DON’T! AND FORGET THE ONES WHO ACTUALLY CAUSED THE PROBLEM PAYING THEM BECAUSE THEY WEREN’T TO START WITH) or lighten the load (enact a law that will encourage people to get the hell out of the truck who aren’t supposed to be there!)  Or how about a sinking ship analogy…

The luxury liner has enough lifeboats to save 2500 people, so they don’t sell more than 2500 tickets.  It’s at capacity but manageable.  But what happens when 200 stowaway sneak on the ship?  Now we have a few problems.  Where do they sleep?  What do they eat?  What about using the restroom?  Is this ship made for 2700?  No, it’s meant for 2500.  Now, what happens when the ship goes down?  Do we think that the people who were there “illegally” are going to say, “Well hell, we weren’t supposed to be here anyways, so I guess we’ll just let them have the boats and we’ll drown.”  Whatever.  I mean really, since they obviously cared so much about the food, safety and comfort of the other 2500 to start with, AND DOING THE RIGHT THING, surely now they will carry that same concern over to saving their own hides?  I would think so.  It’s also sort of the same thing as my number one argument against registering guns.

When the government finally gets a bill pushed through, they’ve been trying forever, that forces all gun owners to register their firearms, what do you think will happen?  I’ll tell you what, because it’s been proven in other countries countless times before.  The law-abiding citizens (the ones that would pay taxes and do their part for their society and communities; to avoid being leaches) would turn their guns in because that is what their told to do and because they actually respect the law.  The criminals who have guns (the ones that didn’t care about your well-being or the ones who don’t care about pulling their weight to be functional citizens) will jump for joy because now the “prey” just got disarmed.  Sounds like a great plan huh?

So, maybe I didn’t have to think this part out after all.  I’m pretty sure what I think about dirtbag leaches, of any race, who try to just cheat the system and live on the backs of other people, with no regard for the problems, burdens, and strains they put on other individuals.  Who cares if they cripple a city’s, or county’s, state’s, or federal infrastructure because it can’t support the number of people who are mooching off the system?  Who cares if some of us have a hard time paying bills, feeding families, or bettering our situation, because we’re actually paying taxes and contributing in other ways, like WE’RE SUPPOSED TO?  I mean that for anybody, any race, any background.  Have some dignity, hold your head high, and do your part.  If you need to, I don’t care if you take part of systems (unemployment, welfare, WIC, etc.) that you have paid into or truly deserve.  But, now some questions.

I saw it asked today online at www.al.com,”What sort of message are we sending the children of the illegals?  That education isn’t important?  That they need to quit?”  ARE YOU SERIOUS?  I get it, I really do.  I want everyone in this entire world to have the education opportunities that we have here.  I understand how awesome that can be.  I know that I do not fully understand the desire to better a child’s life as I do not have them yet.  I do however, understand a few other things.

Is it not enough that we allow anybody born in this country at any time to be a citizen?  Seriously, is that not enough?  No, apparently not.  When I worked for an apartment company, I was shocked at how many people would come there wanting me to lease an apartment, so they could have an address that would put their kids into school.  There was a problem though.  They had no SSN#, no state issued ID, no nothing that could get them an apartment.  Really?  Again, here we go with the mooching.  Don’t you get that the entire reason their asking for proof of residence at school is to prove that you pay taxes in this city/county?  They want to see that you pay state and local taxes to “do your part”.  Let’s not mention the horror stories of other apartment companies that lease an occupancy limit of 8 and they totally disregard this too and put 14 people in it, trashing the apartment, and leaving whenever they get ready, only to never be found again.

I think the bigger lesson is this.  If you want to find a place where you can teach your children that education is important AND that you don’t have to follow any city, state or local laws, then just keep looking.  Go somewhere else.  Maybe that place is out there somewhere.  If you want to teach your kids to be mooches and irresponsible members of society, who care about nobody around them in their community, and the strain their sheer presence puts on the “system”, I don’t think any amount of education will matter personally other than to have an intelligent mooch and that is probably worse than a stupid one. Oh, and don’t forget the most important lesson.  The one where you know you’re in the wrong, the one where you know exactly what you’re doing, and then cry victim when a state finally puts its foot down and says “no more”.  Do you have no integrity or shame?  Really?

We say, if you want to come here and contribute to make this state a better place, then please come join us.  Just do your part.  If you’ll just come work like everybody else and pay your taxes, we even have some government programs to help, and the education for your children is great!  JUST DO YOUR PART.  We even have free clinics for healthcare and lots of way to help you out…IF YOU JUST DO YOUR PART!!!  WHAT THE HELL IS SO HARD ABOUT THAT?  JUST…DO…YOUR…PART!!!!!

Then there’s the audacity to call people who care about this state, who contribute to this state, and who were born and raised in this state, racist because we’ve had enough.  Racist?  You say we “targeted” one group.  I didn’t read that in the law.  I read where it was basically anybody who can’t prove citizenship. Some may be pissed at me because maybe some of this blog seems to steer one way, but I’ve mentioned numerous times that it goes for anybody…european, african, asian, hispanic, european, russian, etc.  If you have a picture in your own mind of who you believe I may be thinking of, look inside your own mind and figure out where that picture came from.  I think that if a law’s enacted, and it affects say, 60% of one ethnic group, then it’s pretty hard to call someone else racist.  I mean there’s clearly a problem,within that group, and I can’t help that.  I would understand it if the law called out a group in writing but it didn’t.  I know that it’s not everybody in any one immigrant group either.  There’s good and bad in every walk of life, but don’t go calling “racist” because a law’s passed that nails one group to the wall based on their own lack of actions to be functioning parts of society.  Don’t be a baby and cry victim when it’s your own fault you’re meeting the criteria of someone under the microscope now.

I mean, hell, you’re upset because you’re driving without a license (IS IT SAFE FOR YOU TO BE DRIVING?  OUR 15 YEAR OLDS HAVE BEEN BETTER TRAINED THAT YOU ARE AT 40!!), because you wanna fly under the radar so you can’t get one (BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOTHING AUTHORIZING YOU TO BE HERE), you get pulled over and it’s discovered that you’re here illegally?  How is that my fault, or the cops, or it makes us racists because we enforce a law?  If you don’t wanna get caught killing someone, don’t kill anybody.  I guarantee you this…you will never be caught being a thief if you don’t break into someone’s house and steal their belongings.  I promise!    IF YOU DON’T WANNA BE SENT PACKING, JUST TAKE THE STEPS TO BE HERE LEGALLY!  IF THE SHOE FITS, WEAR IT.

I guess the only real problem I have is are the children.  It’s shameful and sad to me that these kids who could use a good education and have opportunities handed to them, can’t have them because their parents willfully breaking the law and when asked to answer for it, they flee.  If I cared that much about my children and this law was passed, then I would not cry about it, or start calling people racists.  I would get off my lazy ass and start contributing, I would get whatever paperwork I needed to, and do my best to provide a life for my family…the right way.  I think that’s more of what the law is trying to do personally.  I think it’s trying to say, do your part or get the hell out and go be someone else’s problem.  We the people, of Alabama, have had enough.  We want to give the jobs that are taken up by people who don’t give a crap about us, to the people who do care and deserve them.  I’m not saying you should be put in a wagon at a traffic stop and shipped off.  I’m saying I think you should be given an opportunity to fix it and if not, then you just made your bed so lie in it.

Oh wait, then here come the Feds.  They wanna get us to take it back?  They wanna say it’s un-Constitutional.  I thought the Constitution covered CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES.  Secondly, is it not States’ right if the Constitution doesn’t explicitly cover it?  I don’t see them saying,”Hey, we get it that there’s a crisis going on in Alabama…let us help so we can get rid of this law.”  Nope, they couldn’t say that to us because they can’t even balance their own checkbooks or pay their own damn bills.  I know I get in trouble when my bills aren’t paid, but not our precious government.  They do what they want, and when a state actually tries to better itself, they try to say “no you can’t do that”.  A humanitarian crisis? Really?  How are we creating a humanitarian crisis by asking them to follow the law.  I get it that they’ll need to find elsewhere to go…not my fault.  Go back to Russia, or England, or Mexico, or Korea, or Canada, or wherever….UNLESS YOU WANNA JUST.DO.YOUR.PART!  THEN YOU’RE MORE THAN WELCOME!

When a law enforcement officer apprehends an illegal immigrant, it makes no sense to simply release that individual who has been breaking our laws with no threat of sanction or penalty.
Bobby Jindal

As Congress continues to debate ways to address illegal immigration, we must remember the many hard-working legal immigrants that contribute so much to our nation’s economy and culture.
Bob Filner

Well, you know, I think in conversations with members of the Senate and others, they all recognize that the issue of immigration is important. It’s important to our nation, it’s important to our public safety, it’s important to our security, it’s important to our economic well-being moving forward. And it’s not something that’s going to go away.
Janet Napolitano

In closing, there’s times when I turned a blind eye to these issues because I didn’t see it hitting me, but I do now.  When health care goes up to the point that I know plenty of people with no insurance, or have lost their hard-earned savings, or just can’t afford meds because health care costs have gone up so bad…it does bother me.  Anyone who does the research sees illegal immigration as a huge cause of this and why?  Because we still don’t turn them away (I’m not saying we should).  We do provide so much for individuals who couldn’t care less about the strain they put on our country’s infrastructure.  It’s sad, and I for one am proud to see our state actually do something to help our “citizens” of Alabama!  I know when I turned 18 and was proud to be a voter, I had to register to defend this country if called upon.  It’s a responsibility of my citizenship.  Taxes are a responsibility.  Obeying laws is a responsibility.  There are privileges.  Sure.  But it’s getting to the point that there are millions of jobs taken up by non-citizens of this country or people who aren’t even authorized to work here.  What would happen to the unemployment rates in this country if those millions of jobs were given to American men and women.  Summer jobs from high school and college are few and far between now and why?  You answer it.

This isn’t about race.  This isn’t about ethnicity.  It’s about our country, our states, our cities and our counties enduring a great strain that it can’t bear much longer.  We as American’s are feeling this in our health care, our economic well-being, our schools, and in many other areas.  How much longer can we watch ‘our’ fellow citizens struggle for jobs and a means to provide for their families while the citizens of foreign nations are coming here and contributing largely to the problem?  This is a serious issue in our state and our country and deserves good debate.  It deserves honesty.  It deserves an bi-partisan approach.  If we don’t do something about it now, with unemployment what it is, health care costs rising, a housing crisis, and a failing economy, we won’t be able to provide the “American Dream” for much of anybody, because we will have just got pulled under while trying to keep the world from drowning.  If you don’t watch the news, you should.  We almost defaulted just a months ago.  It’s a real problem that doesn’t need to be ignored anymore.  You want to save our economy?  Put the money in the hands of the people who will spend it here and not hoard cash or send it to some other country.  This immigration issue is not just one small part in my opinion but a large part that if remedied, could help spur on great change in our good ole U.S. of A.

The Hang Up

I saw something my friend MB put on Twitter the other day and here’s what it said (not sure if these are her words or not, but if they are, it’s even better in my eyes.   Regardless, I loved it.)

For those of you I have lied to, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have judged, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have let down, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have mistreated, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have hurt, I’m sorry.

And for those of you who still love me, THANK YOU.

I have convictions.  And they constantly weigh me down.  But I know I am forgiven and have been released from my own personal prison. 

Dare I cast the first stone?

I’ve been so busy lately that I feel like I haven’t really had a chance to think much and that may not be a bad thing all together honestly…I think too much.  Anywho, I read that on MB’s Twitter and it got me thinking. 

I think anyone who’s ever read this blog knows that I am, or would like to think that I am, pretty honest about how much or how often I screw up.  Really, what MB’s post got me thinking about is, why am I so darn hard on myself?  Why am I truly my own worst critic and judge?  However, I don’t think that anyone with maybe the exception of Meg would know how bad it truly is. 

I think that one reason for it, is that I believe a lot of people would like to say they think the same way as MB’s post, but how many truly would live it?  How many people would truly and genuinely recognize their own faults in a manner that would propel them to demonstrate a love towards someone who could change lives?  How many people would actually and fully understand, and own, their state of “screwed-up-ness” to the point that it would prevent them from doing anything other than loving and supporting their friends? 

So, I would say that fear of the truth of relationships could be one reason that I’m so hard and critical on myself.  I think that I have concerns with certain relationships that, and I would say these are grounded to some extent, that if I am not a certain way, I lose friends.  Then one might say they weren’t friends to start with.  Regardless and however it’s worded, I think I have realized that I feel I have to be a certain way and “live my life” for other’s to keep friends around. 

I think I’ve built my own prison.  I have often wondered what happened the “Reagan of the old days”.  Now, in some ways, things needed to be fixed.  But, what happened to the Reagan who was laid back, confident, fun-loving, etc.  I think that after 2007 and periodically since then, I have built my self a prison of trying to repair mistakes from the past and live up to current expectations of people.  I am always on edge now that I’m going to upset someone, or make someone mad, or disappoint someone and that if it does happen, that’s it.  Friendship’s over.  Maybe I need to put more faith in friendships, forget the way friends have done me in the past when hard times hit, or is it that I should really recognize that maybe my friendships are shallow.  I’m not sure and that’s the hard part.  I have had this discussion before with folks and the answer is always “I love you and I’m not going anywhere” or “You can count on me” but I wonder if people know how big of a commitment that is to people nowadays? 

So, what are my options?  Where do I go from here.   Let’s look at it like a swinging pendulum.  (Pendulum Theory)

At one end of the swing (extreme), it’s really not far from where I am right now.  I care about every little thing I do upsetting someone, or disappointing someone, or losing friends, etc.  It’s nerve wrecking and I spend too much time thinking about it I think.  So, that’s one end. 

At the other end (the other extreme), I could just not care at all.  Totally just not give a crap who I hurt, or let down, or do wrong.  Well, obviously it the wrong answer and honestly, I think it’s arrogant.  Everytime I see someone write or say that “I don’t care what people think about me” or something along those lines, I think they’re lying, insecure and trying to present an air of confidence, and arrogant.  So, I don’t think that’s the answer.  I also believe that we as humans, friends, family, etc. do have some level of accountability to people we care about for how we treat them…maybe just not as much as I have in my life right now. 

So, with a Pendulum Theory approach, what is in the middle where the answers usually are?  Well, I don’t think I should expect people to want to be my friend, no matter how I act or treat them because I believe in a certain level of accountability and I believe that if I love them truly, I would want to treat them well.  Also, I don’t think I’m so great that I deserve to have friends around just because I’m awesome or entitled.  I have friends that say, well if they don’t like it than screw ‘em?  Really?  I mean I get it if you think you’re totally doing the right thing, but to just write someone off because you hurt them?  Really?  Who are you and why are you so great that you don’t even care about hurting your friends anymore? 

I also don’t think that I should be totally in knots all the time worrying about upsetting someone.  I have total accountability to my God and my wife and that’s it.  So what is the answer to help me lighten up?  The Golden Rule sounds good, with a slight alteration. 

I believe I should live the Golden Rule, “Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you.”  I believe that.  If I don’t want people making plans then breaking them on me for no good reason, I shouldn’t do it.  If I don’t want to be lied to, I shouldn’t lie.  If I find myself getting upset over something someone’s done, I should take mental notes on that and try my hardest to not do that myself in my own life.  I think that it would be fairly easy to find my boundaries that way.  “Hmm…how should I handle this?  Well, Reagan, how would you want it handled if it were you?”  Easy enough.  And the alteration?

It’s more of an amendment than an alteration.  I think that I should try to stick to the Golden Rule, then leave it alone.  I have a hard time letting go of it and not worrying about criticism, even after I do what I know I think is the right thing.  I need to let it go.  I should trust my own decisions and convictions, and then after I know I have done the best I can with the cards dealt me, I should not blame myself if someone else doesn’t like it.  I can only do so much. 

I think that I see too many people around me that say they don’t care about what others think about them and I know it’s a lie.  Then I see people like me who care way too much about what others think and I see the burden it places.  Maybe the answer is to care what my friends think, because I love them and no other reason.  I should continue thinking that if I want someone to love me faults and all, through thick and thin, good times and bad, let downs and triumphs, then I need to offer that to those I care about.  Then just treat people how I would want to be treated and trust that is enough.  My God loves me and forgives me for my faults and mishaps, even when they’re intentional.  However, I think it’s wrong when people believe that should excuse or justify their behavior or make it okay to continue treating people badly. 

So, I think I have what works “for me”.  Treat people the way I want to be treated, let my love for friends be my guide for accountability and encouragement through hard times, and loosen up.  I can’t control what other people think of me.  I can’t make people like me.  I can’t walk around every minute of the day trying to please everyone either and living in fear of upsetting others.  I can’t walk around “acting” like I don’t care what others think because of course I care if people think I’m arrogant, or mean, or heartless, or cold, etc.  I’m not gonna lie.  But I can’t walk around totally caring day in and day out what they think either when I can’t control it.  I share this load with others.  Instead of think that it’s all me who has the work to do in friendships, I should let others bear some of the burden too, and if you don’t want to, then I’m sorry.  Reagan, just do your best, do your part, and let others decide what and how they want to react.  Now, relax, and have some fun again!

For those of you I have lied to, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have judged, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have let down, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have mistreated, I’m sorry.

For those of you I have hurt, I’m sorry.

And for those of you who still love me, THANK YOU.

I have convictions.  And they constantly weigh me down.  But I know I am forgiven and have been released from my own personal prison. 

Dare I cast the first stone?

Sounds good right?  Sounds like a great thing to “say”.  But, how often DO WE CAST STONES?  How often do we hide behind God’s forgiveness and mercy to say that we are acting perfectly fine.  How often do we say, “Well, God forgives me and loves me and that’s all I need.” in order to make ourselves feel better?  I am pretty sure he cares how we treat each other.  I think I’ll print that off and strive to live it better…and while I’m at it trying to accept others better, I’ll include myself!

Why not just be positive and hopeful?

   I hope this finds everyone doing well in your respective lives your living right now.  As many of you know, I did find a job, a great job actually, working at BBVA Compass and I love it.  When I worked at the bank before, it was to hopefully one day get this job so, now I’m happy to have it.  God has been really kind and faithful to Meg and I so, I really have nothing to complain about…or do I?

   I think this line of thought comes more from just looking at life right now and asking myself, “What will it hurt to just be a positive person?  What will it hurt to just CHOOSE to not let negativity run your thoughts and your life?”  I can’t find one good reason to let negativity have a toehold on me.  Now, this isn’t to be confused with being cautious about things.  This is just about being a person who lets worry and negativity control the way I act and think. 

   I’ve realized that I was more relaxed about stuff when I was unemployed and had no idea where money was coming from for bills than I am right now.  I mean, I just got the job I’ve always wanted, my wife and I love each other, I have great friends who I enjoy being with, a cool cat, etc.  Why am I stressed?  Why am I negative about things?  What is the difference from unemployment to now that makes me more stressed out and stuff?  It’s because I couldn’t do much about things while I was unemployed.  I guess it’s the fact that no matter how much I worried or stressed about stuff, I had no real tools to work with anyway so why worry about it.  I guess my subconscious kicked in and said, “Worry all you want Reagan but you can’t do anything about it.  I think I’ll just quit worrying now.”  So, what do I do now?

   Well, in the last month, I’ve been a nervous wreck about finances and futures.  It’s like for so long I wanted to build a table but had neither wood nor tools to do it.  Now that I do however, I am freaking out about the design, the size, how complex or simple to make it, etc.  I’m not saying by any means that I want to go back to unemployment but I’m sure I was a lot more fun then to be around and I know I didn’t have my mind occupied 100% of the time.  So, where to go from now?

   Well, maybe I should just CHOOSE to realize that regardless of what happens, I have nothing to really complain about.  There are a lot of people out there who are so much worse off than I am.  Also, I have to realize that I don’t have to do everything right and never make mistakes.  I’ve become someone who needs to take his own advice.  I’ve told so many people to not let past mistakes haunt them, then turned around and let mine do that very thing.  I got nailed financially a few years back and now I’m overcompensating to avoid making a mistake.  I need to relax.  I need to quit being so hard on myself and hope that others will be forgiving and encouraging if I do mess something up.  I need to learn to laugh at myself again.  I need to learn to trust God in the good times as much as I do in the awful ones.   I need to just chill out a little.    

   So, in closing, I have two things.  One, let’s all work on putting life in perspective and relaxing a little.  Let’s all learn to laugh at ourselves and our goof-ups some and enjoy the short time that God has blessed us with here.  Two, let’s help each other do so.  If you see me and I seem distracted or pre-occupied, talk to me and if it’s about something that isn’t that big of a deal, help me to realize it and go on about my business.  Sometimes we get so bogged down in our own crap that we can see out of it, so if you’re my friend, you’ll dig in my crap to get me out!  LOL!  Have a great weekend everybody!

If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.

Herodotus (484 BC – 430 BC), The Histories of Herodotus

Random Thoughts Day 3

So, after a busy week, I find myself beginning training next week.  However, today is pretty slow around the branch so my mind is wandering and here’s a glimpse.

1.  Can people with a wonky- eye tell that I’m confused about which eye to look at?  There should be a universal rule for this. 

2.  I haven’t been to the beach in years.  I am excited about going at the end of this month.  It will be nice.

3.  I can’t get over how much fun I had this past Memorial Day weekend.  It’s nice to have friends that can just go and relax and go with the flow.  I’m blessed with some good friends and an even more awesome wife that has taken my friends in without question. 

4.  Why do women think it looks good to wear lip liner and lip gloss?  It doesn’t.  It just looks like you are too lazy to keep your lipstick on.  (I just watched her re-apply her makeup so I know she means for it to look like that)

5.  I need to do a better job of spending time in prayer and worship with God.  I find it so easy and comforting to do that in times of adversity, and forget to put that same effort into it in good times.  I bet it hurts his feelings…it would mine.  Actually, I have friends that don’t speak to me unless they need something so yeah…I need to do better.

6.  People, men and women alike, do realize that burnt orange is not a natural skin tone and that the orange palms of your hands lets us all know you got that color from a bottle?  Right?

7.  Why do I think that talking louder will help the Vietnamese guy across from my desk understand me better?  And why does he think that I should understand his, at-best, broken Engrish rike it be natibe ranguarge?

8.  I wonder how long it will be before companies who block internet stuff, decides to take out Google Chat.

9.  Lunch Time!

10.  Subway is really stingy with the avocado.  Stupid!

11.  I swear I just saw Dwight Schrute’s child.  He was literally a shrunken down version of him. 

12.  That scarf doesn’t match that outfit.

13.  Heartburn sucks!

14. That girl looks like Peppermint Patty with glasses.

15.  I have no idea what sort of frames I want to get with my new glasses in a few weeks.  I don’t know what will look good on me so I’ll need some help.

16.  College football kicks off in 92 days!!!

17.  The big District Executive is here, so…See ya’!

 

Everybody have an amazing weekend!

Random Thoughts, Day 2

So, I enjoyed the “Random Thoughts” post yesterday and have decided to do it every once in a while.  So, Day 2…

1.  I’m amazed that when my beautiful wife was stranded on the street with a car that would NOT move, it was easier people but more specifically, grown men, to yell at her for being in their way than to ask if they could help.  Is that what this world has become?  If my parents saw me do that to someone, they would be so disappointed in me.  I will not grow into one of those people.

2.  Doesn’t need to be put on here right now.

3.  I’m actually sort of excited about going to Subway for lunch.  I usually don’t like that place that much.

4.  Is it really that much easier for someone to hold a conversation with me on Twitter than it is to text me, or call me or something?

5.  I don’t like talking on the phone that much so I think I’ll invent a device that has emergency call capabilities, but is only meant for texting and internet.  I guess sort of like an iPod Touch, but with emergency call.  Make it cheap too.  I mean, wouldn’t people pay for something to just text and have internet on, that was a good bit cheaper than other stuff and only pay a nominal usage fee?  I might…

6. I guarantee you I just saw a woman who would audition for Real Housewives of Birmingham.  Complete with platforms she couldn’t walk in, over-teased hair and dog.  She would be one of the ones that thinks she is beyond gorgeous and who would be mistaken.

7.  I had forgotten how it has always amazed me how careless people, who have a lot of money, can be with said money.  We hear of people all the time not actually shopping for better rates on CD’s or loans, not caring about service fees, etc.  I mean, especially if you’re going to be buying something worth $100K or $200K, wouldn’t you want to make sure that you absolutely have the best rate possible?  That you don’t have to pay PMI?  What about lender and closing fees?  Some folks just don’t care and that blows my mind.  Must be nice. 

8.  My wife is freaking awesome.  She just is.  She puts up with me and still loves me and that’s huge.  she’s hot, smart and funny.  She loves people in ways that most don’t anymore and I’m proud of her for that. 

9.  Steve Carrell must be loaded.  Sure the network executives were willing to give him whatever he wanted to keep him.  I love that show but I’m worried how it’s going to turn out.  Thank goodness that’s a great ensemble cast to rely on.  Will Ferrel sucked I thought.  Thoughts on who they should get now?  What about Chevy Chase?  Eugene Levy?  I mean, the shows is on its dying legs so would anyone be smart to take it considering the chance of perception that it was their fault since they couldn’t fill the shoes of Micheal Scarn? 

10.  If you’re going to have a Mohawk, shouldn’t it be centered?  And are pork chop sideburns necessary with a goatee with holes all in it?  I sure didn’t expect you to drive a Hyundai Tuscon.

11.  What the crap costs $153 to fix a stinking hose on Meg’s car?  Dealerships should be arrested for robbery.  And how did we make it from the early 1900′s to the late 80′s or early 90′s without sticking computers in every car?  I mean seriously…it used to be as simple as taking out a broken part and putting a new one on.  Good as new!  Stupid!

12.  Why am I so sensitive to how people are treating each other lately?  I just went to Subway and watched how people treated the people making the sandwiches.  They don’t deserve to be treated badly.  They don’t deserve to have you talk to them like they’re crap.  They’re humans too and want and deserve the same respect you do.  Geez…another note for something to work on myself…gas station attendants who hate their job and take it out on me…”don’t get me started.  don’t even get me started.” 

13.  Just looked at the weather for this weekend at the lake and it looks awesome!  Boat’s on the lift and waiting, Lance has his boat ready to see if it sinks or not, and I’m just plain ready.  It’s gonna be a great time with even better friends and Meg!

14.  Okay, dealership called and said her car’s total bill was about $182 so I guess I can’t complain about that considering it was a repair and servicing for that price!  I still don’t wanna pay that much.  Stupid!

15.  I need to find some sort of natural remedy for acid reflux.  I think I could dissolve steel if I spit on it.  I wonder if I’m turning into some sort of superhero or something?

16.  Does it bother anybody else when you go to some sort of business, walk-in and they rudely say “we’re closed” while the big freaking NEON sign is saying “OPEN”?  Does it make you even more pissed off when it’s like 5 or 10 minutes before the time on the door says they’re closed?  I freaking hate that!!  Another pet peeve.

17.  Really?  I did do the exact thing you said that I didn’t.  Selective hearing is an amazing thing!

18.  Time to go home!

Random Thoughts…

     I was sitting here trying to decide what to write and realized that I have too many random thoughts in my head to write about anything cohesive.  So, why not just write down random thoughts and see if anything leads to conversation?  So, here ya’ go:

1.  It’s amazing the difference that finally getting a good job has done for my spirits.  I’ve realized now that I was a lot more down than I thought I was.  I thought I was doing a pretty good job of being in a good mood but in comparison and having the ability to look back, I was a lot different from I thought.  Sorry for that folks.  but it makes me appreciate the people who put up with me during that time more than I already did. 

2.  Of all the people I’ve seen wearing cowboy boots, I just laid eyes on the prissiest one ever.  Totally a dude. 

3.  I’m amazed at how easily people can turn their back on each other and act like someone doesn’t exist, yet proclaim the moral compass of Christianity as what drives them everyday.  I’m not a saint by any stretch of the imagination, but I feel confidant in saying that it would take a heck of a lot to get me to just act like I never knew you.  I think that’s one problem that non-Christians have with Christians.  I’ve noticed a lot lately that I find myself wondering about situation that I or someone close to me is dealing with and paying attention at the time of decision on the action required.  How often do I ask myself, “Reagan, I know you’re angry but how would Christ really handle this situation?”  Almost never and that should change.  In fact, it will change.  I’ll still not do it as much as I should but I will try more. 

4.  I’m surprised that after I got this job, my feelings towards acceptance have started to change a little.  Where before I cared so much about everyone I knew liking me or whatever, I don’t so much now.  Of course, I would love to be liked by everyone, but I know it won’t happen.  I’m not an easy person to like I don’t think.  I have more faults than the average human being and have hurt people over the years by doing some pretty rotten things.  But, at the end of the day, I’ve got some pretty great people around me and that’s good enough…it’s actually great.  I know that it takes a lot to get me to give up on people, to not forgive them, to ignore them, etc. and if someone can’t return that favor, I’ll pray for them.  I think that anyone who lives in a world where anger and holding grudges is easy and the first course of action lives in a darker world than I do on my worst day.  There’s a lot to be gained from forgiveness.  After all, God’s forgiveness is all that person needs.  Forgiveness and giving second chances isn’t about the “other” person; it benefits you.  It’s for you.  If you don’t want to forgive those around you, then you’re building your own prison because God’s given the only forgiveness that truly matters to the other person. 

5.  One thing that I have missed about working is the ability to people watch and listen.  People are so interesting and unique and I love that.  I just had an 80-year-old woman tell me, “Oh I can’t do that.  My computer’s so effed up.”  LOL…

6.  I had a great time in Limbo (our Sunday School) class this last weekend.  We had a good talk about Bill Maher and his bold statements.  After a few days of pondering, I still don’t like him.  But I do see situations in the world around me where I want to say, “If you claim to be a Christian, meaning a follower of Jesus Christ, then you should care about what he taught and the way He commanded His followers to live their lives.  Some of the basics are loving those around you, forgiving those around you, and realizing that if God can forgive you for being as crappy as you are and have been in your past, who are you to not do the same to people?  Gentleness, kindness, patience, humility and self-control are pretty big parts too, so, let me encourage anyone who claims to be a Christian, to personally consider these major aspects of our faith and see how good of a job you’re doing…that’s what I’ll be doing as well.” 

7. Can they make a prosthetic leg that wouldn’t cause such a limp?  Put some hydraulics in it or something maybe to mimic the natural absorbing properties of the human leg?  Or special shoes?  No, because then the shoes wouldn’t match.  What about a special foot on the end of the prosthesis that would go inside any shoe?  Hmm…Lance, it’s the idea we’ve been waiting for!

8.  I know people say you can’t smell yourself, but if I can smell you some 20ft away, shouldn’t there be a built-in override switch or something on your nose?

9.  People get all over Christians for being hypocritical.  Is it possible to be a Christian and not be hypocritical?  I don’t think so because otherwise, I feel that would mean I could actually be exactly what Christ taught.  Hmm…

10.  My mind will never comprehend the size of the universe or even come close.  I think the state of Alabama is a large space.  Then you think about that our Sun is nothing in size compared to other stars.  It would be like holding up a basketball and comparing it to the size of a pin head.  Some stars would be that b-ball and ours would be that pinhead.  Then there are billions of those basketballs in just our galaxy alone and there’s countless galaxies at this point.  Geez, it’s so big…”that’s what she said!”  Sorry!

11.  I missed the feeling of waiting for 5:00 to get here and knowing that I had put in a good days work.  I conked out last night in the recliner and said,”what’s wrong with me?  I can’t keep my eyes open.”  My wife responded, “You have a job again!”  Ha!  So true and such a good feeling.

12.  I’m truly a blessed individual with very little at all to complain about.  Some people don’t like me anymore and I can’t say I blame them.  I’m not very likeable a lot of the time.  But, I’m also too blessed with other great family and friends to let one person who doesn’t want to care about me bring me down in relation to others.  I’ll just enjoy what I do have and let the rest go and pray about it! 

I just love everybody!!!